Into the life of Chazz Princeton!
by CHOWY
Summary: One day in the life of The Chazz! Super crappy, but please read anyway! NO FLAMES. R&R please. Read at your own risk. You have been warned xD


**Okay, this is supposed to be plain SLAPSTICK ROFL HUMOUR. Well, you get me. :) So if I go out of point, it's all in the name of humour.  
NO FLAMES PLEASE (i have grown to like Chazz Princeton too and do not wish to incur the wraths of all those chazzy lover doo-doo girls).  
Yes and GX ISNT MINE. how many times do i have to say it before it sinks in?!?!**

* * *

I lounged on the sofa, watching television. Popcorn kernels littered the floor.

Jaden Yuki walked in, glanced at the mess, and remarked. "Wow, Chazz, I think you're mouth must have a very big hole somewhere."

I threw a handful of popcorn at him. I have never been good at eating.

"Didn't your brothers teach you to treat others with respect?" Jaden threw himself onto another sofa, eyes glued on the screen. "Especially the next King Of Games."

"To date, my brothers haven't taught me anything useful," I smirked, watching a hot babe on the screen. The hot babe had long blonde hair, large eyes, and long slim legs I'd love to run my hands over.

Why do all hot babes look like Alexis Rhodes?

"And you," I pointed a finger at Jaden, "are not the next King Of Games." To make my point, I threw a few popcorn kernels at his head. "You are, however, talking to the next King of Games." I smirked.

"Oh yeah," Jaden grinned mischieviously. "Chazz, I trashed the King of Games before!"

I aimed a whole handful of popcorn at him.

He ducked.

What a waste of my popcorn, Jaden should stop irritating me and wasting my popcorn.

"You better apologise for that slacker." My eyes were glued to the screen. The hot babe was joined with several other leggy darlings, and they were now doing some sort of dance on screen.

I didn't know anything about that dance, except their ample chests were dancing along.

I love this sort of dances.

All of a sudden, Jaden that slacker jumped for the control and switched channels.

"Hey!" In a moment, I was gazing flabbergasted at some lame anime on the television.

"Aw Chazzie Wuzzie Darling, please let me watch that." Jaden gave me that sort of disgusting puppy dog look.

"No!" I lunged for the control, which Jaden held out of my reach. "Give - it - back!"

"Pweaseeeeee Chazzie." Jaden attempted to smooch me, then as I swatted him off, blinked his large eyes in an innocent-waif look.

"Okay! Anything!" I turned away, grumbling.

Anything to remove that disgusting look off from Jaden's face. I'd rather he was disfigured than that look ever cross his face again.

Then again, Jaden disfigured, that would be cool.

"Disgusting puppy dog look," I muttered, glancing at Jaden, who was paying great attention to the screen.

I ate somemore popcorn, dreaming about those hot, leggy babes who were doing the Chest Dance. I envisioned Alexis in a suit like that, doing the dance.

I would give up anything to see Alexis dance like that.

A sniffle. "Chazzie!" Jaden bounded into my arms, hugging me tightly. "Poor Mogenta is going to die!" Jaden was crying. "And Aliboobaba The Evil Witch is going to kill her!" He buried his head in my chest as I tried to shake him off. "And her sister Aliboobababibi is trying to stop her!"

It took me a moment to realise Jaden was crying over that lame anime.

_What - the - HELL?_

I tried to throw Jaden off me, unsuccessfully.

Damn it, I want to kill Jaden with a nine inch long sausage.

"SLACKER!" I tried again to throw Jaden off, who was sobbing at the top of his lungs. "GEROFF ME!"

And Syrus that blue haired (fill in the blanks with your choice of word)-head, chose that moment to walk in.

"Chazz? Jay?" Syrus glanced nervously at both of us, then at that irritating bugger sobbing into my chest. "What did you do to Jaden?" Syrus tried his best to look angry, looking about as angry as a mouse.

"I will do anything to protect Jaden!" Syrus came forward, raised his arm.

"No, no, no... it's not my -"

**POW!**

... That slacker!

I'm going to kill him along with Jaden too.

"Why is Jaden crying?" Syrus glanced in increasing resentment at me. I was busy looking at my reflection in a mirror.

Luckily that hit left no scars on my perfect face. Or I would kill that blue-haired bugger.

"Answer me!" And before I had a chance to speak ...

**POW!**

... I stood up, Jaden fell willfully quiet, eyes still on the screen. Syrus cowered.

"YOU SLACKER!" I launched myself at Syrus, pinching him.

"Ow! Ow! Ow!" Syrus howled, then turned to me, grinning. "You pinch like a woman, Chazz."

That slacker! I was being lenient on him!

"I'll show you hurt!" I screamed as I kicked him.

Syrus bawled, "ALRIGHT I'M SORRY CHAZZ! SORRY, SORRY, SORRY!"

You'd better mean it, or I'd throw you to the bottom of the toilet bowl.

Forget it, I'm not staying here.

I heard brain damage is contagious.

* * *

I walked out angrily, ignoring the growing ruckus in the house.

Can't they ever keep quiet?

I have no idea what to do.

Mentally, I plan my schedule in my head, as I glance at my watch and see it is 2.00 pm

2 - 3: kick Jaden

3-4: kick Syrus

4-5: kick Syrus and Jaden.

5-6: bathe and rehearse for Duel Acadamy Idol. Ignore all protests and shouts from Jaden, Bastion, Zane, Syrus or Hassleberry.

6-7: Eat, steal Syrus's food.

Then I see her. She is the girl of my dreams. I have several blown up dolls of her, in perfect likeness, to have fun with in my free time. She is the one I want to see doing a Chest Dance. She is the one whom I wish would bury her head in my chest and cry.

Unlike Jaden.

I change my mind, I know what I'm going to do

2-3: stalk alexis

3-4: attempt to persuade Alexis I would make a great boyfriend

4-5: ask atticus for tips.

5-6: Bathe and rehearse for Duel Acadamy Idol. Ignore all protests and shouts from Jaden, Bastion, Zane, Syrus or Hassleberry.

6-7: eat dinner, most presumably with her.

7-10: stalk alexis.

10-12: attempt to sleep with Alexis.

* * *

I hate the girls dorm.

"So, STOP HARASSING ALEXIS, CHAZZ PRINCETON!"

Mindy and Jasmine sure can scream.

"You shut up, Mindy. You aren't even fit to clean my toilet bowl."

Well, I know something else too.

Girls can kick too.

* * *

I walk through the forest: where did Alexis go?

I recall at dinnertime, when I plonk myself beside Alexis to her disgust.

"Alexis, would you like this delicious piece of fish?" I hold up a piece of fish.

Fine, by the light, it looks gray, and disgusting, and a little slimy, but it _is _my heartfelt gift.

"No." Alexis is very interested in her food. Maybe that is because she is beside me?

Ah. That explains.

"Alexis, would you like this delicious piece of broccoli?" I hold it up in front of her.

"NO." Is Alexis irritated? Maybe she doesn't like all that kind of food.

I sink back into my chair dejectedly. I glance at my halfeaten broccoli which I just offered Alexis. If she had eaten that, she would have shared my saliva, which would mean she would have kissed me!

I try again:

"Alexis, how about this delicious piece of chicken?"

I hold up a piece of chicken, dripping with oil and fats. It looks alright to me.

But evidently not to Alexis.

"Get lost Chazz Princeton!" She gets up from her seat, as I grab her hand and try to stop her.

"I won't give you chicken, broccoli or fish anymore..." I plead, as her attempts to leave the table grow weaker.

"You promise?"

"Yeah, I promise." I grin. "I'll give you my delicious piece of pork."

Alexis's eyes flash. She looks beautiful. I swear those two hanging orbs are flashing too.

"Eat this."

And before I know it, I have a whole plate of rice, broccoli, chicken and fish stuffed in my face.

Not that I mind.

Alexis ate it, which means by putting it on my face, it has her saliva...

I lick it eagerly.

* * *

I see her, she's at the cliff. It is dark. I can sneak up behind her, and maybe grab her ass...

"Quit it, Chazz Princeton." She seems to sense me.

What am I saying? We were meant for each other, of course she can sense me.

"Alexis, I'll be a great boyfriend." I come up behind her, as I stare at her ass.

"By offering my half-eaten pieces of fish and disgusting chicken?" She nearly screams as she turns.

Oops, my hand misses her ass.

"It was a half-eaten piece of broccoli." I grin.

"Oh quit it." Alexis turns and walks back to her dorm.

Staring at Alexis's ass is a great way to pass time.

* * *

I try one last time, before I go to bed.

"Alexis?"

"What?"

"I think I'm getting a fever."

"What do you want me to do about that?"

"Hug me and warm me with those two orbs of yours."

My third punch in today.

* * *

**Well, I got the idea from Huajun Chen, his story is 123456789 times better :)  
Click that SUBMIT REVIEW button before you find yourself in the toilet bowl :)**


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